With half of January behind us, how are you doing with those New Year’s resolutions you set?
If we are to believe the myriad of emails I’ve received (and I’m assuming many of you have received as well) in the past few weeks, you, me, and everyone else is floundering. By the end of the month, we’ll probably have forgotten our Jan. 1st declarations all together.
Just this past week alone I was emailed information on how to achieve my New Year’s resolutions by becoming an expert at social media, learning how to sell from the stage, putting videos into my marketing, losing weight by drinking shakes, and reducing stress by listening to audio tapes.
There is a message being sent to us that unless we buy a program or product, or hire a specialist to guide us, we are destined to fail at achieving our goals. Well I am not buying it or anything else!!
Yes, it’s true the statistics of individuals who successfully reach their New Year’s resolutions and goals are not very promising. And yes, most people make the same resolutions year after year without ever getting closer to accomplishing them. But I don’t believe that investing in a ton of goods or services to aid in accomplishing these resolutions are what will lead to the big change.
In my opinion, there is a lack of preparation and foundational work that needs to be done first, before we swing into action.
Too often, we are not clear on exactly what it is we are trying to accomplish and our motivators are not meaningful enough. Even if we do know what we want and why, we are usually lacking in a concrete plan on how to get there, and we are lacking in the confidence to believe we can truly accomplish what we set out to do.
Any one of those factors on their own is enough to derail us. When all of those ingredients are missing, the likelihood for success is slim to none.
I am here to tell you that change is possible. Yes, change is scary. Yes, change is hard. Yes, change is overwhelming and sometimes stressful. But yes, change is possible!
First and foremost, you need to figure out exactly what it is you really want, and what is your purpose behind setting that goal. For instance, I often hear clients tell me they want to lose weight. Why? What’s the outcome you are looking for? Do you want to lose 10 pounds, 50 or 100? Would fitting into a smaller clothing size equal success?
Next, you have to be clear on the purpose behind that goal. Is it because you feel uncomfortable every time you go to get dressed, and as a result you don’t feel confident in business meetings? Is it because your doctor said if you lose weight you can lower your blood pressure medicine? Is it because you are tired of feeling like the “fat” one amongst your friends?
Once those questions are answered, ask yourself why that is so important to you. What I mean by this is why do you care about being confident when with your colleagues and associates? Why do you care how much medicine you take? Why do you care if you are the “fat” one? Is it important enough for you to actually do something differently?
Change only occurs when we shift what we currently do. If the reason why is strong enough, the how becomes the easy part.
So, if you know exactly what you want to accomplish
… and you understand the purpose of your goal,
… and you know what has to happen to call it success,
… and your motivators are meaningful and strong enough to keep you working towards your goal, then and only then, ask yourself…
What’s my plan? What exactly will you do differently than before? You are the sum total of the choices you make day in and day out. If you want a different result, you have to change. Time to figure out your how.
You need a step-by-step plan, one day at a time, one week at a time, one month at a time. Each small success will increase your confidence that you can do the next small step. Small consistent positive steps lead to huge positive changes. When you believe you are capable of being successful, you will be.
That brings me back to where I started. I would like all those gurus to stop telling you and me that we can’t change on our own. We can. If we know exactly what we want, why we truly want it, and what we need to do to get it.
I am not saying that there aren’t fantastic products, services and coaches who can help you. I’m all for support and accountability. After all, that’s how I make my living. But, do the work first. Then, decide if what’s being offered will help and expedite your efforts. Is what’s being offered part of your plan? If yes, go for it. If not, keep focused on your efforts and keep moving towards your goal.
If you need some help sorting through your goals, motivators and plan, I encourage you to email me at ellen@energcoaching.com to arrange a complimentary strategy session. We’ll meet on the phone, just the two of us, and figure out what you want and how to get it. No strings attached, no purchase necessary.
